Pain Deep Betrayal Quotes
- 0.1 What is the saddest betrayal quote?
- 0.2 What is a powerful quote on betrayal?
- 0.3 What is the intense pain of betrayal?
- 0.4 Why does betrayal trauma hurt so much?
- 1 What is the greatest betrayal?
- 2 Do people forgive betrayal?
- 3 What betrayal does to a woman?
- 4 What are the 3 forms of betray?
- 5 What is a person who betrays another?
- 6 Can someone betray you and still love you?
- 7 What is a deep betrayal?
What is the saddest betrayal quote?
Top 11 Most Famous Betrayal Quotes (BEST) – “As pessimistic as I am about the nature of human beings and our capacity for atrocity and malevolence and betrayal and laziness and inertia, and all those things, I think we can transcend all that and set things straight.” Jordan Peterson The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies; it comes from those you trust the most. Stab the body and it heals, but injure the heart and the wound lasts a lifetime. – Mineko Iwasaki Don’t depend too much on anyone in this world because even your own shadow leaves you when you are in darkness. – Ibn Taymiyyah Betrayal can be extremely painful, but it’s up to you how much that pain damages you permanently. – Emily V. Gordon “He that has eyes to see and ears to hear may convince himself that no mortal can keep a secret. If his lips are silent, he chatters with his fingertips; betrayal oozes out of him at every pore.” Sigmund Freud Betrayal is never easy to handle and there is no right way to accept it. – Christine Feehan “Everyone suffers at least one bad betrayal in their lifetime. It’s what unites us. The trick is not to let it destroy your trust in others when that happens. Don’t let them take that from you.” Sherrilyn Kenyon If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man. – Mark Twain “Betrayal is one of my biggest fears, Betrayal happens on many different levels all the time, and there is no worse feeling than realizing someone you thought you could trust has gone against you.” Katie Lee To me, the thing that is worse than death is betrayal. You see, I could conceive death, but I could not conceive betrayal. – Malcolm X
What is a powerful quote on betrayal?
, Find & Share Quotes with Friends Quotes tagged as “betrayal-quotes” Showing 1-30 of 80 “Backstabbers and malicious people are not worth your attention, but you can thank them for deeming you worthy of theirs.” ― J.S. Wolfe, The Pathology of Innocence “An enemy cannot betray you, as you already expect your enemy to try to bring you down. Only a trusted “friend,” acquaintance, or family member can betray you, and that is what truly makes betrayal so hurtful and sad.” ― Bohdi Sanders, Modern Bushido: Living a Life of Excellence “You keep believing you are loved and valued until they leave you naked.” ― Daniel Oluwaseun “When someone stabs you in the back and then apologizes, accept the apology, but don’t give him the knife back to do it again!” ― Bohdi Sanders, BUSHIDO: The Way of the Warrior “I will forget you as soon as my head lays on someone else’s arms. It’s not a complicated science.” ― Mitta Xinindlu “One who possesses significant low self-esteem, is more likely to betray you.” ― RJ Intindola – (Gandolfo) – 1981 “Worst betrayal always comes from the people we trust a lot.” ― Garima Soni – words world “Betrayal contributes so much to personal growth.” ― Mwanandeke Kindembo “You may remain a couple after betrayal and even establish a quality relationship, but the mental anguish never leaves, and your soul will haunt you forever.” ― RJ Intindola – (Gandolfo) – 2002 “The quick fix to betrayal is to understand your people, the environment you currently live in, and the timing. Wrong move and you have no one to blame but yourself.” ― Mwanandeke Kindembo “Trusting you again gave me more pain.” ― Garima Soni – words world “Never force yourself to trust someone again, as you won’t be able to trust your decisions in the future if that person betrays you again.” ― Garima Soni – words world “Do you ever ask yourself if you have family or so-called friends? Or there are just ordinary people sitting there expecting specific outcomes from you. “The higher I elevate, the more I see the hate.” ― Germany Kent “One who possesses significant low self-esteem, is more likely to betray you. RJ Intindola – (Gandolfo) – 1981” ― RJ Intindola – (Gandolfo) – 1981 “Don’t punish yourself for trusting people and getting betrayed. It’s not your fault.” ― Garima Soni – words world “The evidence was there before my eyes, but I could not believe it. I did not want to believe it. It was only when my sister forced the matter that I was compelled to accept the truth—that my wife had been seduced by my best friend, and was with child by him.” ― Fenna Edgewood, The Seafaring Lady’s Guide to Love “Many have cried a thousand nights of bitter anguish, without tears. “What sound does a tree make when a man takes his Axe to it? Does the tree cry when it hits the ground in pain? – Paul Bamikole” ― Paul Bamikole, Trees by the river “Don’t be nice. Be loyal. Nice can be faked. Loyalty can not.” ― Geoffrey Ocaya “My truth doesn’t live in your lies.” ― Mykisha Mac “I would have taken a bullet for you. It just never crossed my mind that you would be the one to shoot.” ― Ramayana Roxas, At 23 “Manipulating someone who loves you is a betrayal too.” ― Garima Soni – words world “Betrayal is the result of too much trust.” ― Garima Soni – words world “Do not chose betrayal to save your physical body. Don’t forget about your soul and mind, which have more control over us. One day, after all, repentance too can end with a bullet in the head from your own hands.” ― Veronica Braila, Blue House: Ten Years on The Way Home “People don’t betray you.
- They make you open your shut eyes.” ― Garima Soni – words world “You got betrayed because love turned you blind.” ― Garima Soni – words world “Forgiving once is ok, but don’t forgive someone who betrayed you twice.
- Don’t create space for more betrayal.
- Don’t let love make you look like a fool.
- Love is sacred and strong, not so weak.” ― Garima Soni – words world Welcome back.
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What is the intense pain of betrayal?
If a parent or romantic partner violates your trust, you may experience lingering betrayal trauma. This type of trauma may affect your self-esteem, emotional health, and relationships with others, but support from a therapist can help you begin to heal.
If someone close to you has ever broken your trust, you’ve probably felt the sting of betrayal. This pain can leave deep wounds. Any type of betrayal can cause emotional distress, but you might experience lingering trauma when someone you depend on to respect your needs and generally help safeguard your well-being violates the trust you’ve placed in them.
Betrayal trauma typically refers to the lingering pain and turmoil experienced after:
betrayal by a parent or other childhood caregiverbetrayal by a romantic partner
When you rely on someone for basic needs as well as love and protection, you might accept a betrayal in order to ensure your own safety. You might also find yourself accepting the possibility of future betrayals — something that can begin to degrade self-esteem, emotional well-being, and the ability to form attachments with others.
Betrayal trauma was first introduced as a concept by psychologist Jennifer Freyd in 1991. She described it as a specific trauma that happens in key social relationships where the betrayed person needs to maintain a relationship with the betrayer for support or protection. Betrayal trauma theory suggests harm within attachment relationships, like relationships between a parent and child or between romantic partners, can cause lasting trauma.
People often respond to betrayal by pulling away from the person who betrayed them. But when you depend on someone to meet certain needs, this response might not be feasible. Children, for example, depend on parents to meet emotional needs along with food, shelter, and safety needs.
- Similarly, someone who lacks financial or social resources outside of their relationship may fear that acknowledging the betrayal and leaving the relationship could put their safety at risk.
- This fear of the potential consequences of acknowledging the betrayal might prompt the betrayed person to bury the trauma.
As a result, they may not fully process the betrayal or remember it correctly, especially if it happens in childhood.
Why does betrayal trauma hurt so much?
What is Betrayal Trauma? – Betrayal trauma is the result of the violation of a deep attachment, where there has been abuse or neglect of an individual who depends on that attachment for their safety and well-being. Betrayal Trauma occurs most commonly from:
- Child abuse- including physical, sexual abuse, and emotional abuse (e.g., manipulation, gaslighting, verbal abuse, etc.)
- Partner Betrayal- a partner has an affair or lies to you about something significant in your relationship ( money, sexual addiction, etc.)
Betrayal trauma differs vastly from other types of trauma because it involves not just the experience of abuse but also the experience of being betrayed by a key relationship, such as a parent, caregiver, guardian, significant other, or other individual who is relied upon for support and safety. Because the victim is frequently reliant on the perpetrator to meet their physical, mental, and/or emotional needs, they often adapt their behavior in order to maintain the relationship. They may develop:
- cognitive dissonance (the ability to hold two conflicting thoughts at the same time)
- minimization (downplay the severity of an event), or
- betrayal blindness (failure to see betrayal despite overwhelming evidence).
This form of psychological blindness is a coping strategy that protects the individual’s mental and emotional safety by blocking out what is too painful or too frightening to confront. For example, a child may blame themselves for their parent’s bad behavior or come up with an explanation that helps them feel better about what is happening. This can explain why many victims choose to stay with their abusers, and minimize the impact of abuse after it occurs, or why children who are secretly being abused can appear to have a loving relationship with their abusive caregiver.
What is the greatest betrayal?
History’s Most Infamous Betrayers Sept.24, 2003 – From biblical days, to the race to colonize the New World, to the situation in the Middle East today, human history has been dotted with self-serving traitors and collaborators who have betrayed their peoples and their nations.
- But in the end, not everyone had a chance to enjoy the fruits of their betrayal for long.
- JUDAS ISCARIOT: One of the 12 apostles, Judas betrayed Jesus after the Last Supper in the garden of Gethsemane, where he identified the “heretic” proclaiming himself to be the son of God to an armed band by kissing him.
It was the kiss of death for Jesus of Nazareth, but for the Christian faith, the crucifixion and the subsequent resurrection became the central tenets of a faith that has spread across the globe. But Judas was to suffer a punishing fate for his misdeeds.
- The Judaean villager was allegedly paid 30 pieces of silver for his collaboration, but in some biblical accounts, Judas threw away the blood money after the crucifixion in repentance and horror.
- By all accounts, he later committed suicide and the money allegedly went to buy a potter’s field.
- For his collaboration, Judas has turned into one of the most derided figures in Western history and his name today is synonymous with betrayal.
MARCUS BRUTUS: One of the most well-known cries of dismay over a betrayal is Julius Caesar’s “Et tu, Brute?,” uttered when Brutus, a Roman senator, joined a plot to oust Caesar from power. But Brutus’ betrayal was fueled by complicated concerns for the Roman republic.
A beloved friend of Caesar, Brutus opposed the ascension of any single man to the position of dictator, and he feared his dear friend aspired to such power. Brutus’ inflexible sense of honor made it easy for Caesar’s enemies to manipulate him into believing that Caesar had to be killed for the republic to survive.
In the end, the story of Marcus Brutus is the story of the complexities of human choices. The “noblest of Romans” ultimately betrayed his friend because he loved the republic more. DOÑA MARINA: Arguably the most reviled women in the Hispanic world, Doña Marina is known as the traitor — and in some circles, the harlot — who betrayed her people to the viciously cruel Spanish conquistadors.
A former slave, Marina was the translator-cum-mistress of Hernando Cortes, the conqueror of “New Spain” or what is now Mexico. Born into an Aztec family, she knew Nahuatl, the Aztec language, when she was sold as a slave in the Yucatan peninsular where she learned the Mayan dialects. She was therefore able to translate the Nahuatl of the Aztec emperor into the Mayan language, which was understood by Cortes’ Spanish translator.
According to legends, the vital linguistic link proved crucial in helping Cortes conquer the New World. Marina went on to bear Cortes a son and for her contribution to history, she is known as La Malinche, a term denoting betrayal. To this day, the word malinchista is used to describe a Mexican who apes the language and customs of another country.
BENEDICT ARNOLD: At the start of the American War of Independence, Benedict Arnold was an American hero, a brilliant general who fought bravely in several tough battles. By the end of the war, he was commanding British troops against his former forces, a general on the losing side who has gone down in history as a “turncoat” and a traitor.
Embittered by what he saw as a lack of recognition of his military genius, Arnold offered West Point to the British in return for 20,000 pounds and proceeded to systematically weaken the defenses of the strategic fort overlooking the Hudson River in New York state.
But his plot quickly unraveled and Arnold’s contact with the British army, Maj. John Andre, was captured by American forces and hanged. Arnold escaped to a British frigate and although the British never really trusted him, he was given command of British troops. After the war, he and his wife went to England, where he died, the most famous traitor in American history.
MARSHAL PÉTAIN: It was Marshal Pétain’s Oct.30, 1940, speech to the French people after meeting Adolf Hitler — in which he declared: “I am today setting out along the road of collaboration” — that forever changed the connotation of the word “collaborator.” Although Pétain used it in a positive sense, his actions and his role in history turned the term into a synonym for “betrayer.” A French military hero during World War I, Pétain was convicted as a traitor for heading the pro-Nazi Vichy regime after France’s defeat in World War II.
- Following the German invasion of France, Pétain took over as premier from Paul Reynaud and proceeded to sign an armistice with Germany.
- With German support, he established a Fascist-oriented government in Vichy, central France, that accounted for some of the darkest chapters in French history.
- The Vichy collaboration with the Nazis extended to virtually every aspect of life — from the political to the cultural and most notoriously, in the passing of anti-Semitic laws under which French, Spanish and Eastern European Jews were rounded up and deported to German concentration camps.
With the Allied victory, Pétain fled to Germany, but later returned to France to stand trial for treason. He was found guilty and sentenced to life imprisonment to Ile d’Yeu, an island off the coast of Brittany, where he died. TOKYO ROSE: Born Ikuko Toguri, “Tokyo Rose” was the infamous disc jockey whose radio program, Zero Hour, led to the conviction of the Japanese-American woman of treason against the United States.
Born in Los Angeles in 1916, Toguri was in Japan when World War II broke out. From Japan, she launched her career at Radio Tokyo as a part of the Japanese psychological warfare machinery. Under the alias of “Orphan Ann,” Toguri took to the airwaves, beaming propaganda designed to lower the morale of U.S.
troops. On air, she never used the title “Tokyo Rose,” which was a term used by U.S. troops in the South Pacific to describe a number of English-speaking Japanese women employed in Radio Tokyo’s propaganda effort. After the war, she was tried for treason in the United States, and her defense that she was forced to work at Radio Tokyo was rejected.
Do people forgive betrayal?
Why Is It So Hard to Forgive? – The healing process after a betrayal is complicated. It can take a long time, and it’s rarely linear. For many people, it’s hard to simply forgive the person who hurt them and move on as though nothing happened. Forgiveness also often involves another complicating part: Grief & Loss,
Do betrayers regret?
Making amends – What if you are the betrayer? Most people who have betrayed someone they love feel plagued by feelings of guilt, sadness, shame, or remorse. Your own capacity to hurt a loved one may also damage your own self-esteem and identity. If you have betrayed someone you love, the following steps are crucial.
Take complete responsibility for your actions. No matter how driven you felt to have the affair, nobody made you do it. The more you blame your partner, the longer it will take them to believe that you are trustworthy and to want to forgive you. Assume it will take time for your partner to heal. Your feelings of guilt, shame, or humiliation may make you reluctant to raise the topic of the affair or, when raised, cause you to close down the conversation prematurely.
Don’t. Assume that it will take at least a year for your partner to be able to trust you again. You should be prepared to maintain ongoing, sometimes painful conversations about your betrayal. You may also need support from close friends or a therapist.
Be empathic. Your guilt and shame may make you uncomfortable listening to how badly you’ve made your partner feel. However, it is critical that you show empathy and make amends for how much hurt you’ve caused your partner. This is because empathy is an expression of care and concern. Showing that you are willing to bear your feelings of guilt, remorse, or fear of losing your partner—without blaming back or cutting off the conversation—will go a long way to proving that you are someone worth trusting again.
Respect the need for new limits or rules. Your partner has good reasons to be more suspicious than they were prior to the event. Accept that there should now be more transparency around emails, phone logs, and so on. The less defensive you are, the more quickly your relationship will heal as trust is re-established.
What has betrayal taught you?
When a new ENT (Ears, Nose, and Throat) doctor failed to show me compassion, competence, or the common respect I expect from my doctors, I went off the deep end with rage. When I found out nearly a year later that she had neglected to tell me she thought I had cancer because I had no insurance at the time, my brain imploded.
- I had been betrayed by the one profession we’re supposed to be able to trust.
- I was so angry I couldn’t see straight, or function for a week.
- What is it about betrayal, from a spouse, family member, boss, colleague, friend, or professional connection that sends most of us into an emotional death spiral? The violation of our trust is at the root of betrayal.
The more trust issues we have — whether from childhood trauma, sexual assault, or being a victim of any kind — the deeper and more painful each succeeding betrayal is going to feel. There are a variety of fascinating studies about the dynamics of betrayal, the link to the feel-good hormone oxytocin, etc., and explanations of why we go ballistic (especially women) when we’re betrayed, but I want to focus on the 10 things we can learn from a betrayal that will help us move on, heal, and avoid additional incidents in the future.1.We have all betrayed and been betrayed.
- ALL of us.
- That means that no matter how someone else has just made you feel at some time you have done the same thing (intentional or not) to someone else.
- While it’s easy for us to rage and rail against the “evil” people who have betrayed a secret, or deliberately gone against our good in order to secure their good, we have done the same.
None of us is innocent. Remember that as you sit and plot revenge, or rage.2. Betrayal is often a necessary evil for good to prevail. When Judas Iscariot, one of Jesus Christ’s disciples, betrayed Jesus, selling him out for 30 pieces of silver to the Sanhedrin (religious leaders) he became one of the most loathed figures in history.
Yet, without his betrayal, Christ would not have been crucified and become the savior of Biblical prophecy. As a reporter and as a business person I’ve seen how betrayal, the violation of someone’s trust, has both helped and harmed people the betrayal impacted. When I told a friend of mine I believed her husband was molesting their daughters, she felt betrayed and cut off communication with me entirely.
A year later her daughters – all four of them – came to her with stories of how their father had been betraying their trust and molesting them all, for years. She felt like she had betrayed them, and me. She learned to listen better and to weigh information with more sincerity and interest rather than with knee jerk emotional reactions to things that disturbed her.3.
- We can see, sense, and feel betrayal before it happens if we pay attention.
- Going back to the Biblical account, Jesus knew Judas was going to betray him.
- He knew Judas was greedy and he knew that if he were to fulfill prophecy he had to be betrayed. He knew.
- It saddened him, but he knew the betrayal, at the day and time it was destined to happen, was necessary for other events (crucifixion, scourging etc.) to occur.
When I’ve been at certain jobs and brought up wrongdoing or outright corruption, I knew I would be betrayed by managers and co-workers who valued their position and pensions more than the truth, or me. Friends of mine have always known their spouses were cheating on them long before it was obvious to anyone, or they caught their spouse.
We know. And when we don’t, I still believe some part of us (subconscious or not) does. By becoming more aware, centered, and focused after a betrayal we can reduce (not entirely eliminate) the possibility of it happening again.4. Betrayal hurts because it reminds us how vulnerable we truly are. None of us like or want to feel vulnerable if we believe we can be hurt.
People shun love, avoid relationships, and act inauthentically in order to avoid feeling the pain of what we see as inevitable betrayal. Who wouldn’t? Pain is no fun. But while it definitely hurts, it comes bearing a gift as well — that of self-awareness, power, and authenticity.
When we face our fear and learn to risk, to trust, to acknowledge that betrayal is possible in any relationship, just like a traffic accident is possible in any car, we open ourselves to greater life experiences. We live more fully, love more unrestrained, and enhance our time here on earth.5. Betrayal forces us to examine the areas of ourselves, our lives, and our actions we are uncomfortable with.
To get past the pain of betrayal requires we face facts about ourselves and others that we’d rather not acknowledge. Oddly enough, in doing this we can often reduce or eliminate our pain. The more responsibility we take for our inattention, the more control we regain.
What is the trauma of betrayal?
Betrayal trauma is a type of trauma that refers to the pain and emotional distress that occurs when a trusted institution, loved one, or intimate partner violates someone’s trust. Betrayal trauma may occur alongside things like gaslighting and lead to anxiety and depression.
What betrayal does to a woman?
Betrayal Trauma – A scientific study looked into the aftermath of intimate betrayals and the result scientists found they called betrayal trauma, A romantic partner’s betrayal is deemed to be a form of interpersonal trauma. The effects of your partner’s actions are clinically significant, too.
- Between 30% and 60% of those who experienced romantic betrayal showed symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression and anxiety.
- Betrayal trauma can also affect self-esteem, lead to distrust in relationships and mental health challenges.
- If your partner cheated on you, abused you, or ghosted you, you may feel betrayed.
You might also feel betrayed if they don’t prioritize you or you find that they’re repeatedly unreliable.
Can betrayal give you PTSD?
Credit: Karla Ruiz What is Betrayal Trauma?
How do you begin to heal when you discover that your partner has been unfaithful? How do you learn to trust again when a family member has betrayed you? How do you move forward when your boss abused their position of power and sexually harassed you?
In the wake of a betrayal, many people feel their world has been shattered. Some are left wondering whether they even have a future at all. Betrayal and the ensuing sense of despondence can leave victims with chronic distrust problems and crippling self-doubt.
Being betrayed by a trusted person can have a long-lasting impact on physical and mental well-being and compromises the ability to form lasting relationships with others. In her article ‘Understanding Complex Trauma, Complex Reactions, and Treatment Approaches’ Dr. Christine Courtois highlights the interconnectedness of betrayal trauma and Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD), stating that ” complex trauma generally refers to traumatic stressors that are interpersonal, that is, they are premeditated, planned, and caused by other humans, such as violating and/or exploitation of another person” (Courtois, 2019).
Betrayal causes immense emotional pain and has far-reaching physical and psychological consequences, which are not easily overcome in a day, a week, a month, or even a year. Some people never get over the impact of betrayal. Healing from betrayal requires intense reflection and work on personal growth to rebuild a sense of worthiness, self-confidence, and belonging.
Learning to trust others is one of the most difficult hurdles to overcome. Recovery from betrayal is isolating and painfully difficult and often leads to a transformation of the self. Types of Betrayal The most common types of betrayal include the disclosing of confidential information, disloyalty, infidelity, and dishonesty.
At the least, betrayal causes shock, loss, anger, and grief; at worst, it can cause anxiety disorders and PTSD (Rachman, 2010). Examples of betrayal:
Discovering that your husband/wife/partner had a physical, emotional or online affair. Finding out that your husband/wife/partner has engaged in addictive behaviour, e.g. drug-taking, gambling, porn. Experiencing sexual, physical and emotional abuse at the hands of a family member or by a key relationship. Discovering that your friend told someone a secret that you entrusted them with. Finding out that your co-worker used your work as their own to elevate their status. When your family justifies your partner’s abusive behaviour. When a boss abuses their position of power and takes advantage of you. Failure to offer or provide support and assistance during times of physical or emotional need.
Types of Betrayal Trauma
Institutional Parental Partner Interpersonal, e.g. friends.
Additionally, any of these types of betrayal trauma may be accompanied by ‘ betrayal blindness ‘, an unawareness or forgetting of the act of betrayal. (Freyd, 1999). This adaptive response may be associated with betrayals not traditionally recognised as trauma, such as adultery, inequities in the workplace and society, etc.
Does betrayal change a person?
Abstract – Betrayal is the sense of being harmed by the intentional actions or omissions of a trusted person. The most common forms of betrayal are harmful disclosures of confidential information, disloyalty, infidelity, dishonesty. They can be traumatic and cause considerable distress.
- The effects of betrayal include shock, loss and grief, morbid pre-occupation, damaged self-esteem, self-doubting, anger.
- Not infrequently they produce life-altering changes.
- The effects of a catastrophic betrayal are most relevant for anxiety disorders, and OC D and PTSD in particular.
- Betrayal can cause mental contamination, and the betrayer commonly becomes a source of contamination.
In a series of experiments it was demonstrated that feelings of mental contamination can be aroused by imagining unacceptable non-consensual acts. The magnitude of the mental contamination was boosted by the introduction of betrayal themes. Feelings of mental contamination can also be aroused in some ‘perpetrators’ of non-consensual acts involving betrayal.
Is betrayal the worst emotion?
Betrayal. In truth, betrayal is one of our worst fears. Betrayals can occur within families, in the workplace, among friends, and in the most sacred space of marriage. All betrayals are difficult to come to terms with, yet betrayal within the confines of an intimate relationship can feel like the worst violation of all.
Within a marriage, betrayal by a spouse can create an upwelling of emotions and leave serious devastation in its wake. If ignored, dismissed, or allowed to fester, the effects of betrayal can cause irreparable harm to a relationship. When faced openly and honestly?and with appropriate, wise support?betrayal can be understood, addressed, and ultimately healed.
The idea of betrayal brings a litany of distasteful thoughts and images to mind: unfaithfulness, lies, humiliation, disloyalty, violation, infidelity, distrust, disappointment, anger, anxiety, disillusionment, pain, hurt, and fear are a few uncomfortable words that may arise.
In truth, betrayal is far more than uncomfortable; it can be downright heart wrenching and toxic. As with most relationship challenges, the possible upside to betrayal is the fact that learning and healing may ultimately bring greater health to the relationship. This article, the first in a three-part series, is designed to help you learn more about betrayal.
MOTIVATIONAL SPEECH – God just broke your heart on purpose.
In better understanding betrayal, you will then be able to move through?and beyond?any hold it may have on you and your relationship. Healthy marriages, like all good relationships, must have a foundation built on trustworthiness and faithfulness. When choosing a healthy partner, we search for someone who can offer emotional safety and security.
We seek someone we can have faith in and count on through thick and thin. Of course, even when one?s mate seems like sheer perfection, no human is ever truly flawless. Even the best people and the most caring relationships have their faults and hiccups. When one partner betrays the other, the seeds of deep distrust have been sown.
As the old adage goes, “It takes much time and energy to build trust, yet it only takes a few seconds to destroy it.” Once the damage of betrayal has been done, the only way to repair the situation is to face it openly and courageously. After learning of a betrayal, fear and anger often set in quickly.
- Once the shock has worn off, those confronted with the harsh reality of betrayal often find themselves asking questions such as, “Why me? Am I unlovable? What did I do wrong?” In reality, the person who has been betrayed did nothing to cause the betrayal.
- Making the decision to betray one?s partner is ultimately the complete responsibility of the person who chose to take the action.
All too often, the betrayer responds defensively by offering a host of excuses to support the betrayal. Common defenses include: “You were working too much!” “You never pay attention to me!” “If only you would have more sex with me, I wouldn?t have had to look elsewhere.” The one who has been betrayed may accept the justifications and assume that the fault rests with some personal failure or defect.
Although such responses by either partner may be instinctual and protective in nature, they ultimately create greater harm to the relationship by ignoring the full depth and nature of the root issues. In learning to understand the roots of betrayal, it is vital that partners engage in a great deal of personal soul-searching.
Self-honesty is a critical component in understanding the root causes of betrayal. It is important to delve into the deeper issues in order to determine how the problems can be fully and properly addressed. Otherwise, the tendency is to ignore or white-wash the more intense aspects of what really caused or allowed the option of betrayal.
- The pain caused by betrayal brings many personal unresolved issues closer to the surface.
- Most people shy away from digging deeper into the emotions that arise, to do so can be incredibly uncomfortable and painful.
- First and foremost, the person who has been betrayed must accept that they did not cause the betrayal.
If you have been betrayed, it is not your fault; it is not your responsibility. Although a partner may have pre-existing patterns that contribute to problematic issues, no spouse can cause the other partner to enter into an act of betrayal. It is important to let go of any martyr, victim, or self-blame role in order to truly move through the host of difficult emotions that arise.
There is no timetable for this process; it can leave the betrayed person feeling very raw and exposed. The spouse who committed the betrayal may also experience an upwelling of painful emotions. Some move through various emotional states and stages with ease, while others take months and even years to process the betrayal.
In general, healing occurs more readily when an individual is willing to face emotions and thoughts in an open, nonjudgmental manner. During this stage, talking with a confidant or close friend can be very beneficial. It is important to engage in good self-care that includes proper nutrition and relaxation.
- Exercise and contact with nature can be extremely helpful in allowing emotions to surface and be released.
- Journaling in a private diary?allowing thoughts and feelings to arise without censure or judgment?can be deeply cathartic.
- It is important to allow the full range of emotions to arise?anger, rage, sadness, bitterness, regret, disappointment, fury, embarrassment, shame, grief, and sorrow are just a few of the painful responses to betrayal.
“Raw” reactions can be normal, for there are few things in life that are as painful and torturous as betrayal. After the painful emotions begin to subside, the resulting clarity allows for greater reflection and self-honesty. It is at this point that partners can begin to explore the unresolved patterns and issues that may have contributed to marital difficulties.
Again, accepting blame for the betrayer?s actions is counter-productive. Both the betrayer and the betrayed can utilize this next stage to understand the unhealthy issues that exist in the relationship. Self-honesty is critical to moving through this next stage. Without open and honest personal reflection, the problematic patterns that underlie the betrayal are not addressed or resolved.
Reaching out is essential after learning of a betrayal; a trusted friend, psychotherapist, or clergy member can offer essential support. We often strive to ignore painful, uncomfortable emotions, but avoidance only worsens the situation. When emotions are allowed to arise in a healthy manner, healing ultimately results.
What is the root of betrayal?
The Roots of Betrayal (Clarenceux, #2) 1564: Catholic herald William Harley, Clarenceaux King of Arms, is the custodian of a highly dangerous document. When it is stolen, Clarenceaux immediately suspects a group of Catholic sympathisers, the self-styled Knights of the Round Table. Francis Walsingham, the ruthless protégé of the queen’s Principal Secretary, Sir William Cecil, intercepts a coded message from the Knights to a Countess known to have Catholic leanings.
- He is convinced that Clarenceaux is trying to use the document to advance the cause of the Catholic Queen.
- And soon Clarenceaux enters a nightmare of suspicion, deception and conspiracy.
- Conflict and fear, compounded by the religious doubts of the time, conceal a persistent mystery.
- Where has the document gone? Who has it and who really took it? And why? The roots of betrayal are deep and shocking: and Clarenceaux’s journey towards the truth entails not just the discovery of clues and signs, but also the discovery of himself.
James Forrester is a historian by profession. He has published a few medieval and early modern non-fiction titles under the name Ian Mortimer (his full name being Ian James Forrester Mortimer). He lives in Devon with his wife and three children, on the northeast edge of Dartmoor.
- The Clarenceux Trilogy was inspired by contemporary documents in the National Archives and the British Library discovered in the course of his scholarly research.
- The main character is William harley, Clarenceux King of Arms, a herald.
- It is concerned with loyalty and betrayal – and set in the 1560s, when loyalty to one’s spouse, to the state, and to one’s religion were exceedingly important – so much so that betrayal of these things could end respectively in flogging, being hanged, drawn and quartered; and being burnt at the stake.
Displaying 1 – 30 of 70 reviews Read this book in 2012, and its the 2nd marvellous volume of the delightful “Clarenceux” trilogy.The year is AD 1564, and William Harley, a Catholic Clarenceux King of Arms, is in possession of a highly dangerous document.When this secret document gets stolen, he suspects a group of Catholic sympathisers, a group calling themselves the Knights of the Round Table.Protestant Master spy Francis Walsingham intercepts a coded message from the Knight to a Countess with Catholic leanings.In this world of suspicion and death Walsingham is convinced that Clarenceux Harley has sent this message in order to advance the cause of the Catholic Queen.Thus will Clarenceux Harley enter a world of nightmare, conspiracy and deception, where hate about the other’s religion, fear, and in this conflict of minds a persistent mystery is deeply concealed.For Clarenceux Harley the important questions are, who has that document really, who took it in the first place, and where is it now, and in this maelstrom of dangerous events, the roots of betrayal will be slowly visible for Clarenceux and the results of that truth will also be shocking to himself.What is follow is an intriguing and thrilling historical mystery adventure, in which William Harley will get deeper and deeper into this morass of deceit and betrayal, and where his life is in danger from different sides, but most of all from the queen and her hound of hell, Francis Walsingham.
Highly recommended, for this is a wonderful addition to this amazing trilogy, and that’s why I like to call this episode: “A Magnificent Clarenceux Sequel”! This is the second in a trilogy of novels featuring William Harley, Clarenceux King of Arms. At the end of the first book, “Sacred Treason”, Clarenceux found himself in possession of a document which could destroy the reign of Elizabeth I.
Charged with protecting this document – a marriage agreement between Lord Percy and Anne Boleyn, which proves Elizabeth to be illegitimate with no right to the throne – by Lord Cecil, Clarenceux finds himself in a very difficult position. Walsingham still believes Clarenceux to be a traitor and the Catholic Conspirators, the so called Knights of the Round Table, are angry that he has not used the document to try to bring back a Catholic monarch to the throne.
- Clarenceux wants to live in peace, but it seems that is unlikely to happen.
- Even his wife, Awdry, is pushing him to take a post as ambassador in Antwerp.
- However, even as he demands to be left alone and to put the past behind him, the worst happens.
- The document he is charged with protecting goes missing and it looks as though Rebecca Machin, who aided him in the first book, has stolen it.
Before long, he is plunged again, unwillingly, into adventure – being drugged, tortured, captured, escaping, going on the run, captured by pirates and trying to discover the whereabouts of both Rebecca and the ‘Catholic Treasure’. Whereas “Sacred Treason” was very much a complete novel in its own right, this is very much part of a series.
- You really need to have read the first novel for this to make sense and it also feels that there is more to come.
- That is not to say it is not a good read.
- As a story, it is much more faster moving than the first book; with a great deal of adventure and excitement.
- It also makes you want to read on to find out what will happen in the last of the trilogy, “The Final Sacrament”.
There are some great new characters, including the daring pirate Raw Carew and his crew. An enjoyable book and I look forward to seeing what will happen next. I’ve really enjoyed reading both of James Forrester’s Clarenceux books. They are well-crafted yarns, which rattled along at a good old pace.
The added bonus is the historical accuracy, with so much of the plot coming back to following wherever the power and the money are. If you like historical fiction and are interested in the Tudors, then this is for you. I enjoyed reading the first book in this series, Sacred Treason (will post review soon), so I was looking forward to reading this second installment in the trilogy.
At the start, I was a bit confused on the introductory chapter about pirates. Having prior knowledge of the plot from the first book, I was a bit thrown off by the pirates. It was interesting, mind you, but I just still was not getting how it will tie in to the plot.The first half of this book with the background chapters on the pirates and all the running around that Clarenceaux was doing was a little cumbersome for me to wade though.
I wanted to get to the meat of the plot already! I realize much later in the book how these introductory and background chapters came into play, but I wanted to be embroiled in the story right away like I was in the first book. – See more at: This is the second in what appears to be a series featuring William Harley, Clarenceux.
I did read the first. How Clarenceux can still be alive I am not sure as this is truly stretching the notion of having 9 lives. I will immediately start reading the third book as I am interested to see what further trouble will visit him as he attempts to serve loyally as herald with the added challenge of being a Catholic during Elizabeth’s reign.
In this book we see him betrayed by Cecil, hated and tortured by Walsingham, tortured by Knights of the Round Table, imprisoned and physically tortured by others as well. The focus in these books is action and setting, rather neatly set up for video production vs emphasis on literary phrasing and emotional tone.
Thus.while many brutal and exciting scenes are played out, one is not brought to tears but rather anticipating what zany impossible to believe escape will come next. I have been reading this series of books featuring the character Clarenceax, in chronological order, and so far have really enjoyed them but this latest one I found was a bit too bogged down as regards the overall story line and I got a bit fed up with the detail and confused as to who was betraying who, and who was a traitor and whose side the characters were on.
- Nevertheless I shall follow on and read the next in the series and the next if available, as I do overall enjoy them Another triumph from historian Ian Mortimer under his pen name James Forrester.
- Swashbuckling fast-paced action mixed with wonderful characters, moral dilemmas, surprising plot turns and rich historical background, plus great writing – what could be better? Going straight on to the next and last book in the series.
I picked this up because I enjoy historical book reads.and I was severely disappointed by this.This book seems to messy and all over the place. Nothing seems logical! I got very annoyed with EVERYONE in this book, from Cecil (hello this is the beloved Cecil that I love to read about in other historical fictions, but definitely NOT this!) to Clarenceaux to the pirate.
- The bulk of the book had a lot of information to wade through and didn’t make it an easy read.
- I got lost a few times and was a little bored by what was going on.
- It wasn’t until the action scenes that it got interesting, especially when Clarenceaux was in the fort fighting his way out to find Rebecca, who supposedly has the Percy and Boleyn marriage paper.
A lot of backstabbing, plotting and back and forth. Sort of interesting but not a fan of the main characters so I’m not going to pick up any more books with this character in it. Rip-roaring tale; historically compelling in depictions of Elizabethan England; attractive and interesting characters that pull you into the story. But ultimately, it falters on the believability of the incidents: the protagonist is stabbed through the hand and is fighting with a sword 3 days later; cut on the face, shoulder, without food for days, but swims for miles, runs for more and travels many miles on a fast horse.
Pirate has a 3/4″ pistol ball removed from his leg then jumps up and races to engage in a attach on a fortified castle where he kills 6 people, grapples, leaps and runs about, is slashed and his innards come spilling out, swims miles.etc and still survives.Ring at end is inscribed with message, but how this could be arranged defies logic.
And the reason why a pirate would risk everything to save the protagonist is not compelling. I wanted to like this but the plot line was too problematic. A book sent to me from my local bookshop as part of my historical fiction subscription, I found the book didn’t need to be read in sequence as it was just as good as a stand alone.
- I found some of the chapters very gruesome, but that was indicative of the era, and I was guessing at each turn as to who had the Catholic treasure.
- There was a lot of skulduggery! I’m glad to have read it though.
- I liked this book more than the first one.
- I like the main character but the level of peril was quite high through the book which kind of reduced the impact somewhat.
I recommend this book and will read the final in the trilogy. Clarenceux became rash and foolish in this continuation. I liked the other characters, particularly Raw Carew, and the storyline but Clarenceux’s actions had me rolling my eyes and thinking about quitting reading the book.
- These books are unexpectedly great reads.
- Marvellous A cracking tale, with pace,twists and turns, I find it difficult to put down, many thanks to the auth,for such an interesting journey The Roots of Betrayal This is the second book of the trilogy, such a good read, I couldn’t put it down, now for the final chapter, the suspense is??????!!!!😱😂👏 Originally published at “The roots of betrayal lie in friendship; those of treason lie in loyalty.”This quote could easily sum up this second volume of the trials and tribulations of William Harley, the Clarenceaux King of Arms.
When you read the line, it seems so obvious, as if it should be a common saying.Imagine my surprise to discover that the fiction author James Forrester was quoting himself (as historian Ian Mortimer) from his book The Greatest Traitor. It doesn’t make the words seem any less self-revealing, or any less “true” in the case in William Harley.The lesson of Clarenceaux’ story could be taken as “keep your friends close and your enemies closer”, although the man seems to have a difficult time determining which are which.And, to use our vernacular instead of his, if it wasn’t for bad luck, he wouldn’t have any at all.History remembers the Elizabethan Age (maybe we should be calling it the First Elizabethan Age) as a Golden Age.
- England defeated the Spanish Armada.
- Shakespeare’s career flourished.
- Elizabeth’s reign was the time of England’s glory.But we forget that it didn’t begin that way.
- Elizabeth’s reign had a shaky start.
- There was a significant amount of religious dispute between Catholics and Protestants.
- Many wanted a return to Catholicism, and fomented revolts in favor of Mary Queen of Scots, Elizabeth’s putative heir.The problem with Elizabeth being the “Virgin Queen” was that virgin queens have no children to inherit their thrones.Into the middle of this we have the roots of William Harley’s betrayal.
In Sacred Treason (reviewed at Book Lovers Inc.) Harley is entrusted with a document proving that Queen Elizabeth was illegitimate because her mother, the executed Anne Boleyn, was pre-contracted to Henry Percy. (This was a big deal in the 1500’s)At Anne’s trial, this was one of the many charges, but there was no documentary evidence.There are conspirators who demand that Harley use the document to start a pro-Catholic rebellion.
Harley, although he is Catholic himself, refuses. He is wise enough to know that rebellions only lead to death and repression.Then the document is stolen from its hiding place in his house. Harley believes that he has been betrayed. But by whom?Every single person who has ever known about that document operates on the belief that someone has betrayed their trust.
Clarenceaux is certain that the widow Rebecca Machyn, his partner in misfortune in Sacred Treason, has betrayed him. Francis Walsingham, an agent of the crown, is certain that Harley has betrayed the government and is working for towards a Catholic conspiracy.Harley’s wife Awdrey believes that Harley has betrayed their marriage vows.Because Harley is certain that his life is forfeit for losing the document, he chases after Rebecca Machyn, believing she has the document.
- Walsingham chases after Harley.Where is the document, and why was it stolen? Who is at the heart of what conspiracy? Where is the betrayal? How many betrayals are there?Escape Rating B+: The Roots of Betrayal was every bit as much of an immersive experience as Sacred Treason.
- In some ways, it was better.
Part of the emotion of Sacred Treason required following along with William Harley’s falling slightly in love with Rebecca Machyn, and that part didn’t work.The Roots of Betrayal is a story of honor and betrayal. Political conspiracies and political paranoia.
- Lies and deceit.
- This time, Harley follows Rebecca because he thinks she’s stolen this document and he’s afraid for his life and the lives of his wife and children.
- He knows what happened last time.
- His house was ransacked, his possessions were destroyed, his family had to flee London.
- He was nearly killed.He’s also correct that a rebellion will only end in repression and death, not just for the rebels themselves, but anyone who might be thought to be sympathetic.
If the rebels are Catholic, then what little tolerance currently exists will be ruthlessly suppressed, probably in blood.His chase leads him through dark places. He forgets everything but his need to find that document and prevent anyone from using it.
- He finds more honor, for certain strange definitions of that word, among thieves and pirates, than he does among supposedly ladies and gentlemen.Sacred Treason fascinated because of the political plotting.
- The Roots of Betrayal is almost a “road novel”.
- In his desperation to find the document, Clarenceaux leaves behind his comfortable, middle-class life and finds himself in more and more desperate straits at ever turn.The people he meets along his journey are what push the story, and the reader, forward.
Each time he learns of another link in the chain, he meets a new group of amazing characters. Each person’s agenda layers on top of, or thwarts, his. The idea that pirates have more honor than supposed gentlemen is one that sticks with you when you’re done.
In The Roots of Betrayal, the sequel to James Forrester’s Sacred Treason, William Harley, Clarenceux King of Arms and known to most as Clarenceux, continues his struggles to keep himself and his family safe against the schemes of government swirling around England and to stay true to his Catholic faith.
But will his hope to live a happy, simple and free life ever become a reality? Not anytime soon it seems!The Roots of Betrayal picks up six months after Sacred Treason and begins with Clarenceux reunited with his wife and daughters. While life seems to have settled down he still cannot feel completely safe with the knowledge that he is hiding a secret document for William Cecil, Queen Elizabeth’s Secretary and chief advisor, a document that calls into question the Queen’s legitimacy and that has caused many deaths in the attempt to secure it.
Clarenceux is also disturbed by his continued feelings for Rebecca Machyn, the widow of Henry Machyn – the man who brought Clarenceux into the twisted web surrounding the document – and the woman who helped him secure and hide it. On top of this, the Knights of the Round Table – the Catholic men who know of this document and wish to use it to bring down the Protestant Queen – have been pressuring Clarenceux to take action with this “Catholic Treasure”.
Wanting peace between other Catholics like himself and the Protestants, Clarenceux has withheld using the document knowing it will only bring a religious revolution that will see many more killed. But how long will he be able to hold it safe and hidden before someone on either side of the divide finds a way to get their hands on it?Soon the worst has happened and the document is stolen, he believes by the woman he cares so much for, Rebecca.
But as he begins his search to find her and the document he discovers that there are many more people involved in its theft and more betrayals than he could ever imagine. How will he ever find the document – and Rebecca – when every step he takes seems to lead him in so many different directions? And when so many people seem to think he is involved in the document’s disappearance (including a cutthroat pirate!) and continue to use interrogation, torture, imprisonment and even kidnapping in their attempts to use Clarenceux to find the very document he is also searching for, will he even be able to stay alive long enough to find out the truth of who took the document and where it is? When everyone seems to be turning against you, who can you trust?As with Sacred Treason this novel starts with a bang! From the very beginning there is endless action, the plot twists and turns and twists again, until it is seemingly impossible to know where the story is leading.
When the truth is finally revealed the reader is able to sit back, take a satisfying deep breath and look back over the adventure to realize the great lengths they have gone along with the incredibly brave and moral Clarenceux. Watching him struggle with his beliefs and his need to do the right thing, whatever that ends up being, is a great journey on its own.
Add in the action packed and sometimes incredibly dangerous aspects of the adventure and it is hard to set the book aside to do anything else.One of my favorite facets of this story was the inclusion of Raw Carew, the ruthless pirate that, at times, seemed to have a heart of gold. He lived by his own set of rules and he never wavered from that strict code of conduct he expected all men who followed him to live by.
While he did much that was dastardly he also had many admirable, kind qualities that made Clarenceux, and the reader, question what makes a man good or bad. If they are godless, as Carew was, does that make them a bad person? What if that same person saves your life while putting their own in danger? These sorts of questions pop up throughout the story and really make the reader sit back and think before jumping back into the continuous danger and action.
The Roots of Betrayal has so much to offer a reader that I cannot think of someone who would not enjoy it. Whether you love history, adventure, action, conspiracy theories, complicated love stories or just stories that keep you guessing until the very end there really seems to be something for everyone.
While you don’t have to read Sacred Treason to jump into this novel I would highly recommend it as that book is just as wonderful as this one. I am really looking forward to read the final book in the series, The Final Sacrament, as soon as I can get my hands on it! The second book of this series and which I found the most readable of all three.
I must say that the plot did seem rather far fetched with Cllanenceax even ending up kidnapped by a pirate and fighting against rival ship sent to intercept sent by Walsigham and the pirate finally become a good friend and even dies trying to save Clarenceax! Not quite the usual historical fiction Title: The Roots of BetrayalSeries: Clarencaux Trilogy bk 2Author: James ForresterGenre: Historical Fiction1564: Catholic herald William Harley, Clarenceaux King of Arms, is the custodian of a highly dangerous document.
When it is stolen, Clarenceaux immediately suspects a group of Catholic sympathisers, the self-styled Knights of the Round Table.Francis Walsingham, the ruthless protégé of the queen’s Principal Secretary, Sir William Cecil, intercepts a coded message from the Knights to a Countess known to have Catholic leanings.
He is convinced that Clarenceaux is trying to use the document to advance the cause of the Catholic Queen.And soon Clarenceaux enters a nightmare of suspicion, deception and conspiracy. Conflict and fear, compounded by the religious doubts of the time, conceal a persistent mystery. Where has the document gone? Who has it and who really took it? And why? The roots of betrayal are deep and shocking: and Clarenceaux’s journey towards the truth entails not just the discovery of clues and signs, but also the discovery of himself.I have always loved history, and at one point I wanted to be a history professor and study this time period.
My love of literature however far outweighed my love of history. But I’ve always enjoyed reading historicals whether there was a romance or not.When I was asked to read Sacred Treason the first book in the series I leapt at the chance as I loved the theme behind the story.
- Nights of the Round Table, treason, love.
- When Sacred Treason ended I wondered what happens next.
- Especially between Clarenceaux and Rebecca as Clarenceaux was married.As the next chapter in Clarenceaux story begins we are introduced to a new set of characters and get to revisit some from the first book.
One of those new characters is Raw Carew and I have to be honest and say I fell more than a bit in love with him. He’s one of those characters where you want to him to achieve the goal he has before him, and then come back for you.There are a lot of twists and turns in this book as Clarenceaux searches for the missing documents, is betrayed by those he thought he could trust and finds unlikely allies in places he would never have thought to go before.
His feelings for Rebecca come to a resolution and it’s one that I’m glad happened the way it did.I will tell you this when it’s revealed who took the documents you will be surprised as it was the last person I thought it would be, and yet as they tell him why they did it it made perfect sense to me.If you love history, especially this time period this is one series you won’t want to miss, I know I’m glad I didn’t.Grade AReview By: Heather – See more at: 1564: Catholic herald William Harley, Clarenceux King of Arms, is the custodian of a highly dangerous document.
When it is stolen, Clarenceux immediately suspects a group of Catholic sympathisers, the self-styled Knights of the Round Table. Francis Walsingham, the ruthless protégé of the queen’s Principal Secretary, Sir William Cecil, intercepts a coded message from the Knights to a Countess known to have Catholic leanings.
He is convinced that Clarenceux is trying to use the document to advance the cause of the Catholic Queen. And soon Clarenceux enters a nightmare of suspicion, deception and conspiracy. Conflict and fear, compounded by the religious doubts of the time, conceal a persistent mystery. Where has the document gone? Who has it and who really took it? And why? The roots of betrayal are deep and shocking: and Clarenceux’s journey towards the truth entails not just the discovery of clues and signs, but also the discovery of himself.
A little over a year ago I read Sacred Treason by James Forrester – the Pen name of Ian Mortimer – and was immediately hooked into the trials and tribulations of William Harley and his family in 16th century England. In The Roots of Betrayal, the second of a trilogy featuring Clarenceux King of Arms, Harley is back with a vengeance determined to ensure the safety of not only his family but a document that would have serious repercussions around England – the Percy/Boleyn marriage agreement – should it be discovered and used to bring down the reign of Elizabeth.In his author notes at the end of his book, James Forrester reemphasises that The Roots of Betrayal is a work of pure fiction and should not be considered historically accurate.
- That’s all well and good but for someone – me – with incredibly limited knowledge of the Elizabethan era I absorbed his narrative with gusto and found myself living the life of a gentleman in the late 16th century.
- For me, the main goal of an historical fiction book is to entertain and give the reader a flavour of what life could have been like, I stress could.
In The Roots of Betrayal the sights, sounds and incredibly pungent aromas come alive and you – as the reader – are effortlessly transported back into a time when religion played a key role in shaping a country where Catholicism was illegal and various conspiratorial gatherings necessary to keep the religion alive.
Full review It wasn’t until I started this book did I realise that the characters were vaguely familiar; then it hit me that I had read the prequel. Thank goodness I did for I don’t recommend anyone to read this before reading the prequel or the significance of what has gone on before and what will happen after will be lost.
We open to Raw Carew taking over a ship, a charismatic outlaw pirate that will be the runaway hero of this book. We see him in all his ruthless glory in the prologue, meant to lay the foundations later when the layers of his complex character are slowly pulled back.
- Then we cut back to Clarenceux, still guarding the all important document, now treading the delicate balance between the normalcy of his life amongst the heavy weight of his experience and secrets he carries.
- Then the document gets stolen.and the race to recover it begins.
- Roots of betrayal definitely gets a while to get going, a good third of the book was spent laying the foundations.
But once it does get going, it does so unapologetically, with all engines firing. Or in Carew speak, all sails unfurled. Through a series of events, Carew forges an unlikely alliance with Clarenceux and though these two men couldn’t be more different, they recognised a single mindedness and determination that was innate to them that they respected.
- They were of the same mettle, and instinctively they were probably drawn to each other because of that.
- Raw proved that he could be godly without being religious while Clarenceux proved that religion can be used to twist others into doing godly things.
- I dare you to read this book and come away totally unaffected by Carew, for that is impossible.
In the midst of the threat of strife between the Catholics and Protestants during the Elizabethan times, when one must either be on one side or the other, Carew was a rare breed who was neither but probably showed more morality and scruples than them combined.
All my stars are for Carew and for him alone. More than the plot, the characters, the setting, he touched a chord within me and I connected to his character and understood his motivations even if I didn’t have to agree to certain things he did. And admired him for his wit, his courage, his love and his character.
In all our struggles, the last word is hope. I hope his spirit lives on and will appear somehow again in the final instalment of the trilogy. Warning: Never try reading this book before any meals. The graphic description of violence might just turn you off whatever delicacies are spread on your table.
- William Harley, known as Clarenceux, is a worried man.
- It is 1564, and there are so many ways that a man can be accused of treason and lose his life.
- Clarenceux is a Herald of the Queen, someone who is charged with ascertaining the family history and lineage of various individuals.
- But he is also a Catholic, and that is a dangerous place to be in the court of Elizabeth.
There is a document Clarenceux has been charged with keeping for safety. It could be used to declare Elizabeth illegitimate, and is called The Catholic Treasure. It is a very dangerous document, as the use of it could tear England apart once more into another bloody religious war.
Imagine Clarenceux’s shock when he checks the hiding place and finds it missing.The Roots Of Betrayal covers the quest to locate the missing document. It involves those high in the government such as William Cecil, the Queen’s chief advisor, and his man in charge of investigating conspiracies, Francis Walsingham.
On the other side are a Catholic group who call themselves Knights of The Round Table, who are determined to use the document to restore the English crown to a Catholic. They use Widow Machyn in their plots, aware that Clarenceux has feelings for her.
Other players include corrupt men in the administration who will stop at nothing to keep their power, and a ship of pirates, headed by the most notorious of all, Raw Carew. Clarenceux must weave his way between all these factions to try to reclaim the treasure that only he can keep safe, preventing another round of bloody war.
James Forrester has written a fast-paced, exciting historical adventure. Forrester is the pen name of Dr. Ian Mortimer, Fellow of the Royal Historical Society and winner of the Alexander Prize for his work on social history. His scholarship concerns this time period, and the details of the story reveal his knowledge of everyday life in this era.
Readers will thrill to the nail-biting suspense and admire the hero, Clarenceux, who is motivated by love of country and who uses his knowledge and logic to escape the various predicaments he finds himself in. This book is recommended for readers of historical fiction and for those readers interested in an intriguing suspense tale.
With The Roots of Betrayal, James Forrester has once again delivered a thrilling historical fiction adventure. It’s been a hectic month with the end of the semester, but this book transported me to another world. It was hard to put it down and get some sleep!The Roots of Betrayal is the second novel in a trilogy about the William Harley, Clarenceux King of Arms.
Clarenceux is a secret Catholic during a time that it was very dangerous to be a known Catholic. In the first novel, Clarenceux worked with Rebecca Machyn to solve a mystery and discovered a document that could bring down Elizabeth I as the legitimate ruler of England. Fearing that this would create a religious Civil War, Clarenceux has concealed the document in his home with the blessing of the Queen’s advisor, Sir William Cecil.In The Roots of Betrayal, Clarenceux discovers that the document has been stolen from his home and that he has been betrayed by Rebecca Machyn.
Clarenceux goes on a perilous voyage to discover the forces behind the betrayal and robbery and also above all, to protect his country from religious warfare. Along the way he meets pirate Raw Carew. Carew was at first seeking the “Catholic Treasure,” but then puts himself on the path of revenge against an individual that harmed the people he loved.
Carew and Clarenceux become unlikely allies and work together to solve a perilous mystery.The Roots of Betrayal was a unique story with a great twist for the ending – I did not see it coming. I love books that lead me on a great adventure and have me guessing until the very end. I loved the setting in 1564 in Elizabethan England.
It has always been a fascinating period of history for me. I also enjoyed the characters. I loved the introduction of Raw Carew. He was a “Robin Hood” of the seven seas. He was an interesting character that followed his own moral code. He did some dastardly deeds and was fascinating overall.
What are the 3 forms of betray?
V1 V2 V3 V4 V5 Form of Betray
|Base Form (V1)||betray|
|Past Form (V2)||betrayed|
|Past Participle Form (V3)||betrayed|
|s / es/ es (V4)||betrays|
|‘ing’ form (V5)||betraying|
What is a person who betrays another?
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Betrayal is the breaking or violation of a presumptive contract, trust, or confidence that produces moral and psychological conflict within a relationship amongst individuals, between organizations or between individuals and organizations. Often betrayal is the act of supporting a rival group, or it is a complete break from previously decided upon or presumed norms by one party from the others.
Can someone betray you and still love you?
Can You Love Someone And Betray Them? – No matter the violation of trust you or your partner have experienced, it can be very difficult to resolve and overcome. Betrayal trauma can be emotionally draining and devastating. However, everyone makes mistakes.
Making mistakes doesn’t mean we do not love our partners, we do not appreciate them, or we do not want to be with them. At PIVOT, we look at love as a verb. Are you being loving toward your partner? Some days for personal reasons, we may not feel capable of giving and receiving love. Life challenges arise and can sometimes bring a tremendous amount of fear, anxious feelings, and depression.
Not feeling loving does not excuse betraying our partners. Communication is key. It is your responsibility to share how you feel with each other so expectations are realistic. Mistakes happen. How we deal with those mistakes is what we can use to show our partners just how much we care about them.
How long does hurt from betrayal last?
How long does betrayal trauma last? – Overcoming the pain and heartache from your partner’s betrayal can be complicated. Recovering from betrayal trauma is not something you can rush through in a day or two. It takes between eighteen months to three years for most people to fully recover.
- Healing, of course, lies not just in the efforts of the individuals involved but also in taking the correct steps to ensure that recovery takes place in a healthy way.
- How long betrayal trauma lasts depends on how closely you follow those steps as a couple or individual. Dr.
- Evin Skinner said, “to heal from betrayal trauma, betrayed spouses need education, professional help, compassion and support from loved ones.
Knowing it’s not their fault and they are not alone provides tremendous relief and healing.” The truth is that recovery isn’t a finish line you cross. It’s a process of healing that finds you experiencing triggers less often and with less intensity across time.
Can love survive betrayal?
In my four decades of being a relationship therapist, over half of the couples who come in to see me do so because of some kind of broken trust. Most of them want to rebuild their relationship, and many do stay together. Sadly, that doesn’t mean that they have truly healed that anguishing breach.
- There is a marked difference between preserving an existing relationship and committing to build a new one out of the rubble.
- The pain and sorrow that accompanies an anguishing rift in trust does not easily dissipate.
- Both partners must be fully committed to whatever it takes to learn from what has happened and turn towards a believable future.
Even when there are strong feelings of guilt, fear, anger, hurt, insecurity, self-doubt, and humiliation, many intimate partners may still have a bond that they do not want to end. Their relationship may still be deeply connected to friends, family, religious or spiritual ideals, financial stability, and their mutual, important history.
They may also abhor facing social judgments that can span from support to shame. Both partners struggle to balance between continuing a besieged relationship and experiencing the grief of splitting up. Betrayals come in many forms. When couples look back in time, they realize that some might have been predictable.
Others seem to have crept up, without the partners realizing that an inevitable breach was about to occur. Even when a relationship seems healthy and unassailable, they can fall prey to a betrayal that cannot be easily predicted or explained. Most people hold the word betrayal as synonymous with infidelity,
Perhaps that is because it is the most common form of broken trust in an intimate relationship, and represents the most basic elements that destroy faith between intimate partners. Committed partners traditionally promise one another that they will remain faithful for the duration of their relationship and they use that sacred agreement as the foundation of all other trusts between them.
When one breaks that promise, the fallout from that deception infiltrates the sexual, emotional, mental, and spiritual bond that couple have based their love upon. Though both men and women share many overlapping emotional responses to being betrayed by a partner, the men I see often experience the loss differently.
- They tell me that they feel not only betrayed, but also robbed by a “brother” who has taken what was rightfully theirs.
- Even if they initially try to see their partner as having been taken advantage of by that other man, they eventually come to the realization that their deceiving partner had to have had a part in her decision, making it harder for them to forgive her.
Many women whom I have treated are wounded and angry by their partner’s betrayals, but their underlying programming often makes them feel in some way responsible. Perhaps they feel that they have not been sexually satisfying or that men have a harder time being committed to just one woman.
- Even though they know that their partners made the decision to deceive, but still wonder what they might have done wrong.
- The sting of being replaced and the fear of loss often eclipse their legitimate feelings of betrayal.
- Those confusing contradictions are most often manifested in alternate feelings of rage and grief.
Though infidelity encompasses areas that are familiar to most, there are other breaches of trust that can be as equally destructive to a relationship. They produce similar feelings and reactions, and the same challenges for couples to overcome. For example, the repeated patterns of people caught up in addictions can slowly erode the trust of any intimate partner.
Those trying-hard-to-keep-believing partners often come to me riddled with the anguish of multiple broken promises from partners who have vowed to give up compulsive and destructive patterns of self-abuse. They want to believe each new set of promises, but wear thin over time being unable to compete with the demons that pull their partners away.
Why, then, if betrayal is so destructive to most relationships, do couples find themselves so often enmeshed in them, and what do they need to understand to not only make them less likely to happen but possible to overcome? When couples commit to a relationship, they agree to follow the ethics, values, and behaviors that will ensure that their relationship continues to thrive.
Depending on how well they know themselves and each other, they make those agreements in good faith, and trust that each will live by them. However, in many long-term relationships, most people’s needs, desires, and dreams change over time. What each partner was very willing to commit to at the beginning of the relationship often needs reevaluation and revision as the relationship matures.
If intimate partners are open and authentic with each other from the start, they let one another know right away if the original agreements need to be re-examined. They then work hard at renegotiating them to keep the partnership up-to-date and alive.
- They find no need to keep their thoughts and feelings from one another even if they are hard to express.
- In that kind of atmosphere of openness and authenticity, they do not allow secrecy to take root.
- Unfortunately, that level of courageous and heroic openness is not typical for most partners.
- In many committed relationships, one or both partners may, over time, not feel as comfortable with his or her initial commitments and fear reprisal or loss if they confess them.
Understandably reticent to share those potentially threatening feelings, that partner may keep them silent, hoping the thoughts or feelings are just a passing fancy and will hopefully dissipate over time. Sometimes, they do. But, at other times, they begin to take on a life of their own, becoming more difficult to ignore or confess.
As those experiences grow stronger, they become the drivers that push that partner into acting upon them. Here is an illustration. Many years ago, I was working with a couple whose relationship was on the brink of disaster. There had been no infidelity, no addiction, no unspoken redistribution of funds, or any breaking of the bonds of devotion to family.
Yet, what happened between them made reconciliation and healing impossible. John and Mary (fictitious names) had grown up in the same town and known each other since the fourth grade. They attended the same Catholic Church and schools together and their parents were devoted to each other and to their God.
Their marriage was witnessed by over three hundred people who had known them since childhood, and blessed them for a charmed life of commitments to their religion and to each other. When John was accepted at a prestigious college in Boston, Mary and their 1-year-old daughter dutifully followed. They found a compatible church close by their modest apartment.
They quickly made friends within the church and began their mutual devotion in the new parish. John had a style of kindness and openness that easily blended with other students and professors in his new academic environment. He began hanging out with people who had different social, economic, and religious points of view.
- As he learned about their new ways of looking at social, political, and religious ideas, he began to doubt some of the religious doctrines he had unerringly and willingly followed all of his life.
- At first, he felt like he was committing a sin to doubt his lifetime path to God.
- He didn’t have the heart to tell his wife of his conflict for fear that she would not be able to handle the situation.
Yet, his desire to understand how his Catholicism fit into the greater picture of multiple religious devotions began to deepen and grow. Pretending to study at school, he began attending meetings at a Buddhist temple with the new friends he had grown to love and admire.
- The teachings felt freeing to him and more similar to the way he currently felt about his personal devotion to God.
- After a few months, Mary noticed that he seemed fidgety at church and uncomfortable in the presence of the priest.
- She suggested he go talk to him if he was struggling with something.
- She was sure he could help.
Fortunately, the priest was gentle and supportive. He encouraged John to find the best in both of those paths and to search for a way to God that felt right for him. That night, emboldened by the priest’s kindness and understanding, he confessed his feelings to Mary, hoping she would understand.
Sadly, his worst fears came to be. Aghast, angry, and frightened, Mary threatened to leave him if he did not immediately change his mind and his behavior. She felt not only betrayed, but humiliated that he had been “carrying on” with this “anti-Christ” behavior behind her back. She believed that her husband had perpetrated a terrible sin and that God would only forgive him if he immediately returned to their professed faith.
Issuing him a final ultimatum, she would take their child and leave him forever were he to make any other decision. From Mary’s point of view, this was a case of unforgivable betrayal. John’s feelings of self-doubt and guilt combined with her understandable feelings of being deceived were no different from what I had witnessed many times in dealing with couples undergoing the betrayal of sexual infidelity.
They had agreed to live by the same rules and ethics and he had knowingly deceived her by committing to another belief. She could not forgive him his act of betrayal and could not grow into a new agreement that would allow him to be authentic. Both were suffering the terrible loss of each other, but neither could give up the competitive commitments that were crucial to each.
Sadly, their situation was irreconcilable. The agonizing breach eclipsed whatever bond they had carefully established and nurtured. But not all betrayals, even at this level of heartache, are beyond hope. I have seen other relationships where the partners so value one another that the concept that they will never be together again is simply unacceptable to both.
They become committed to the possibility that the betrayal will somehow become the foundation for a deeper and more devoted relationship and they are willing to do whatever is necessary to make that happen. If a couple suffering the agony of broken trust is committed to transforming their relationship, they must both be willing to follow some clear guidelines for this kind of miraculous outcome to happen.
The partner who has clearly betrayed the other must be able to witness and admit his or her intentional breaking of the emotional, physical, spiritual, or intellectual faith they once shared. That remorse must be absolute and the deception must not be excused by the situation at hand.
People who have made self-serving decisions to act in a way that causes irreparable harm to their partners must be willingly accountable for what they have done. They cannot blame, make excuses, dismiss or minimize the action, nor expect their partners to heal before they are ready. They must also be willing to do whatever is necessary to put in the energy, time, and caring required to build a new relationship.
The betrayed partners have their own path. Yes, they have had their world turned upside down and have undergone severe damage to their sense of trust, self-worth, and faith in the other partner. But, they must still be willing to fight for resolution despite their legitimate pain.
If love and other sacred attachments are still present, those betrayed partners must be open to examine their own participation in what has happened and work hard to get through the understandable need to express their wounds and desires to retaliate. When the couples I’ve known who have been fully willing to commit to this hazardous journey, they look back at the betrayal as the wake-up call that preceded a new level of commitment and depth in their relationship.
Every relationship is unique and each story is different. No one should feel guilty if he or she cannot get beyond the aftermath of a severe breach of trust. By the same token, no partner who still loves the other should run from a potentially quality relationship that has temporarily lost its moorings.
- Though the path to a thriving reconciliation can be difficult and long, many intimate partners who have fallen into the chasm of broken trust not only can find their way back to each other, but can do so with a new and deeper faith in themselves and their new relationship. Dr.
- Randi’s free advice e-newsletter, Heroic Love, shows you how to avoid the common pitfalls that keep people from finding and keeping romantic love,
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What is a deep betrayal?
Abstract – Betrayal is the sense of being harmed by the intentional actions or omissions of a trusted person. The most common forms of betrayal are harmful disclosures of confidential information, disloyalty, infidelity, dishonesty. They can be traumatic and cause considerable distress.
The effects of betrayal include shock, loss and grief, morbid pre-occupation, damaged self-esteem, self-doubting, anger. Not infrequently they produce life-altering changes. The effects of a catastrophic betrayal are most relevant for anxiety disorders, and OC D and PTSD in particular. Betrayal can cause mental contamination, and the betrayer commonly becomes a source of contamination.
In a series of experiments it was demonstrated that feelings of mental contamination can be aroused by imagining unacceptable non-consensual acts. The magnitude of the mental contamination was boosted by the introduction of betrayal themes. Feelings of mental contamination can also be aroused in some ‘perpetrators’ of non-consensual acts involving betrayal.
What is a famous Shakespeare quote about betrayal?
William Shakespeare quote about betrayal from Cymbeline | Betrayal quotes, Personal quotes, Karma quotes William Shakespeare quote about betrayal from Cymbeline: “Though those that are betray’d do feel the treason sharply, yet the traitor stands in worse case of woe.” Find this Pin and more on by,
What is worse betrayal or death?
To me, the thing that is worse than death is betrayal. You see, I could conceive death, but I could not conceive betrayal.